I, Propitiator: "Chapter 3"

Chapter 3

“There is no love without forgiveness and no forgiveness without love.” –Bryant H. McGill

Mom had sent Oliver, Kanda and me to the safe-house on the edge of Convala while she flew the ship back to the Sol System Space Station. We each took a separate room, yet sleep would not come to me as the fact that my tongue had used such disgraceful language haunted me. It was like in the silence, the only words that could come back to memory were “I must leave.” No reasoning, no logic, not even an inkling of self-respect. What was wrong with me?

Meanwhile, Mom docked the ship at the space station and walked through the central ring. It was busy as usual, with various resistance members going about their day as if her presence was of no consequence. Then, an all too familiar voice called from behind, “What brings you here Ms. Avner?”

Mom became rigid; her thoughts raced on how to answer the man whose foolish actions nearly killed her son many years ago. It wasn’t his fault; they were all in the wrong place at the wrong time. Yet if only Oliver and Mason had been more careful… perhaps things would be easier on all of them… turning to face him, she answered, “The Arashad Regime intercepted my nephew’s letter to you. It contained a series of potential upgrades you could provide for us on our specific ship.”

Mason looked shocked as he said, “David really should have delivered such information to me directly… is it safe to assume everyone else is well looked after for now?”

Now more relaxed, Mom continued, “For now, but we recently freed a Ms. Kanda Tamwong from some guy named Zurui so he mi-”

Mason’s eyes widened as he cut her off, “Zurui? He just reached first on the resistance’s most wanted list this morning. Apparently, he almost single-handedly took down a hundred of our ships stationed at the Neptunian outpost. If he’s after you guys, you will need more help than this whole station.”

About five light-years away, the A.R.S. Zoelight, the flagship of the Arashad Resistance, changed course to head for Terra Lapsa. Captain Lee, currently the ship’s first officer, made his way over to the mess hall. Along the way, Itxaro, the ship’s executive science officer, came over to him. From the expression on her face, Capt. Lee knew she had something that she wanted to talk to him about. As he got his food from the chef and took his normal seat, he said something in rapid succession which caused his colorful tipir to make a few adjustments to his food. Itxaro only got a cup of tea, being half Vytor and half I, she rarely ate anything. Food wasn’t as necessary for her as it is for you or me. Setting the cup down without so much as taking a sip, she inquired, “For what reason has the Prime I decided to alter course? He knows that type-A asteroid we were headed for holds many things that could prove useful to my research.”

Capt. Lee took his time to chew and swallow, buying himself time as he searched for an answer. Then with a soft, but clear voice, he offered, “It should seem that he has found Terra Lapsa to be in grave danger and wants to be in position in case the Arashad Regime decides to launch an attack.”

“It could be weeks before we get there…”

With a certain clarity uncommonly found, he assured her, “Therefore, it is imperative that we make haste lest we loose the most precious planet in the galaxy to the enemy.”

Itxaro nodded, seeming to understand the dire circumstance. It wasn’t so much that there was a special advantage in defending Terra Lapsa from the Arashad Regime as much as it was that the Prime I valued that little blue marble enough to die defending it. As she was about to say something, a reverent silence fell upon the room: the Prime I had entered.

His golden hair flowed majestically, like the mane of a lion. His amber eyes were piercing yet affectionate, like fire simultaneously consuming and warm. Every eye was on him, for though he often walked among them, his very being commanded respect, no… it was deeper, more like admiration for someone that had so much power, yet used it for the good of those whom he loved.

Itxaro inhaled deeply as she watched him gracefully glide across the room. She was immersed in the moment, just captivated by the way he moved. A sense of peace overcame her. Simply being in his presence gave her a deep desire to know him more. How could she ever question him? And yet she had, and even after an experience like this when she came onboard a month ago. She felt so foolish, so silly worrying about a simple asteroid… heck where was even an asteroid belt on the way to Terra Lapsa… She’d have plenty of asteroids to research in due time. There were at least twenty type-A asteroids in that belt. For now, it was enough to drink in the glory of his radiant face and sit in the same room as the Prime I.

Oliver dialed Gabriela’s phone number. She was an I that we had worked with on some deep space missions. At the moment, she was stationed somewhere on the east coast. It rang a few times, then she answered, “Good evening, Oliver.”

“Hey, how have you been?” Oliver started out, like as if it was some casual conversation.

“It’s been busy, feeling anxious for my next assignment. What about you?”

“Running for my life, nothing out of the ordinary. There was a question on my mind; will you attempt to answer it?”

Well aware of how dangerous their occupation could be, she didn’t press to know why he was in danger; she simply proceeded with, “Sure.”

“If person A does something that effects person B, and person B is hurt by it, yet person A didn't actually do anything wrong, can person B still forgive person A?”

She hesitated before responding, as if to consider what Oliver might be referring to. Eventually, she concluded that it didn’t involve her or else he wouldn’t be asking, so she said, “If person A didn't doing anything wrong in any sense of the word 'wrong', then there is technically nothing to forgive and person B needs to see that although what they feel is pain, they should have the maturity of accepting that the pain they feel is not by any wrongdoing of person A but by their own personal emotions or unfavorable circumstance.” Then after a moment of silence she continued, “And this is coming from someone who’s been person B before.”

Oliver felt that he should respond, but knew not what to say. Now with his predicament with David, he knew it was necessary to follow what she said, but it seemed so surreal.  All he could manage was a simple, “Thanks.”

They caught up on a few other recent events and then he hung up the phone. Shortly afterward, Kanda knocked on his door. He cleared his throat and said, “Enter.”

As if trying to impress him, she gracefully walked in, so softly that most would say nothing had happened if they were merely listening. Then she spoke slowly, as if to be clearer, “Thank you for coming to my rescue. It could have cost you more than your life. Zurui is a ruthless man who loves to torment his victims rather than granting them an easy death.”

“You’re welcome, but given what you’ve said about Zurui, that’s only more reason for me to come to your aid, not a reason to back away.”

Kanda’s face flushed. Trying to hide it from him, she looked away. Oliver noticed, but pretended not to. This would not be his first time of playing dumb. He had a record of doing that with some of the stuff Amelia did when they were younger. The silence made Kanda uncomfortable, wanting to be with him, but also not wanting him to know that she had feelings for him. Sensing that he would not do anything to ease the tension, Kanda cleared her throat, “Well, it’s getting late, see you in the morning.”

She turned to leave. And you know what? My brother let her walk out! It was the perfect moment to make something significant about it, perfect time to say something touching, even if he didn’t want to be with her, he could have said so, but no. He just sat there, as if there wasn’t anything special, as if this was nothing out of the ordinary. So disappointing…